Applied Psychology: Adapting the “How” for the “Who”


Have you ever wondered why, after utilizing innovative sales techniques and investing a large amount of money on various promotional schemes, your business volume has maintained status quo, or even declined?  More than likely there is one key element missing.

You must look closely at your expertise in communications.

Each of us has a primary interpersonal behavior model with various percentages of other psychological needs mixed into our total personality.  Therefore, to assume that what motivates you is what will motivate your customers is often inaccurate.  What style of communication you choose to use with them may close the sale, or turn them away.  For someone who prefers definite and rigid leadership, a more laid-back individual may be viewed as “weak”.  An autocratic style may be devastating to those who “feel” things.

The goal is maximum communication, but before we can communicate we must know the language each individual understands best.  Remember that we all are a blend of different behavior models.  Tune in to the different styles that are most evident with your customers.  Then respond appropriately to what you see.  Speak to your customers in a language they understand.  Provide an environment which is appropriate.  Listen carefully, keep copious notes, follow up, and be flexible and responsive.

By taking a proactive approach, keeping communication skills a priority, and making a concerted effort to attend to the unique needs of co-workers and customers, you should be well-equipped to move your business into the next evolution.

Dr. Bruno Bethlehem once said, “If you want to communicate with a child, you must become more child-like. It is impossible for the child to become more adult-like.” The same hold true with those of us wishing to use a language or behavioral style to connect with others.

I had the privilege of consulting for a presidential candidate (who did in fact win the White House). We coached him to adjust his Words; Tones; Gestures; Postures & Facial Expressions to those of his audience. So when he was communicating with the local garden club, he softened his approach and used nurturing tones and words. He used a different behavioral style, words and verbs at the Young Millionaires Club and at the State Bar Associations talks!

There are dozens of time-tested models that have shown to increase connection and favor when communicating with other. I have used and taught, four models in particular, depending upon the group and desired outcome.  In fact, we even write ad and as campaigns targeted for the audience by demographics and products – as well as when hiring and for team building.

I welcome your input thoughts on this topic.

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